Wednesday, June 1, 2016

Just So You Know...  
This is a glimpse into the heart of an "empty nester".  When I first wrote this, I didn't intend to publish it.  It was just for my middle daughter, Brittany.  But as the days have passed, it occurred to me that there are probably some parents out there that have felt the same way and who might appreciate this poem.  Just as a way of giving a bit of context, my wife Karen and I have three amazing grown children.  Erin, Brittany and Jono (Jonathan).  Now Erin and Jono have both always been very independent and I always knew that when they were grown they would go off and do their own thing.  But Brittany was always the one who liked being at home around family, and in fact from a very early age if you asked her what she wanted to be when she grew up she would tell you...I want to be a mom and live next door to my mom and dad.  So it really caught me off guard when she told us that she and her husband and our young grandson would be moving 1500 miles away.  I think I did a pretty good job of keeping my composure until after the move, but then it hit me the first day back home when I realized that I wouldn't be seeing them for a while.  This poem began to play in my mind and wouldn't leave me alone until I had written it down to completion.  I share it here for all my friends to enjoy, but it is specifically for Brittany, ....

Just So You Know

Why does my breath just catch in my throat
What’s this hallow feeling deep in my chest
Nothing really seemed to matter today­­
Still my mind won’t seem to rest
Something precious to me is now missing
Someone I’ve counted on isn’t there
I’m trying to keep myself busy
But I find myself stopping to stare
Everywhere I look is a reminder
In every room something catches my eye
I know I’ll get used to this new normal
But when no one is watching still I cry
Because the pain in my heart is so deep
And the days ahead of missing you so real
I’m not trying to make you feel bad for me
I just want you to know how I feel
I understand that you’re where you belong now
And it’s natural that children grow up and leave
But if anyone had ever told me that you would go
I really never would have believed
So I guess in my own way what I’m trying to say
And what I want you to understand
Is just how much I love you
And how proud of you that I am
That regardless of what else may happen
No matter where you may go in this world
There’s one thing that will forever and always be true
You will always be Daddy’s baby girl~~

  Ps 127:3 Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward.

I have to add that I am extremely proud to be the Dad of all three of my kiddos.  They each make me feel very blessed to have raised such awesome adults.  Each of them has a very different personality and they each have great strengths and skill sets.  They have all been a huge blessing and help to me since my wife Karen got sick, but Brittany took on the roll of sort of being my right arm and I will forever be grateful for that.